Navead and I went back to California this weekend for a couple's retreat at Bosch. The theme of the workshop was "Pure Gold Marriage" and it was largely about communication and character development as parts of healthy, functioning relationships. The emphasized idea is that marriage is not just about being in love and maybe having a family, it is about the personal growth. In the Baha'i Faith as well as in other religious traditions, developing virtues or character qualities such as trustworthiness, justice, patience, kindness, generosity, compassion, forgiveness, truthfulness, self-discipline and so on is one of the primary purposes of life. Naturally, marriage is one of the most intense forums for developing such qualities because it is difficult to live so intimately with another person and experience all the ups and downs with them. However, if a couple can manage to practice those character qualities with each other and look first at their own shortcomings, they may have a real chance at surviving, even enjoying, a lifetime commitment to each other.

It's a really high standard to shoot for, but who wants a mediocre marriage? Or to suffer through a divorce if it doesn't have to go that way?

If this concept resonates with anyone, Pure Gold is a pretty good book.

And for those of you who are wondering, we did see Navead's father as well. We had a nice visit, fun even. It was good.